They approached me and asked if I was Chinkee Tan. They mentioned that they have been following my blogs for quite some time.
The short conversation turned into a short seminar while I was in the pool wearing my trunks and these are some of the things I shared to the newlywed.
This is one of the best advices that I received before I got married.
There is a tendency to slow down in courting your wife after marriage.
Never commit the mistake of taking each other for granted.
The romance does not stop after you exchange your “I Do’s”.
The romance and relationship just started.
Second best advice I received was…
DATE YOUR SPOUSE EVERY WEEK
This has been a saving grace for my marriage to my wife for over 14 years turning 15 this year.
I make it as a priority to date my wife once a week. This had been our maintenance to take time off from our busy schedule from working and raising our family. A weekly date helps us to remind each other why we got into this relationship in the first place.
Quality time with each other is a must.
We need to strengthen the relationship between husband and wife to maintain the unity and security of the family.
Secure Relationship = Secure Family
APPRECIATE YOUR WIFE ON A DAILY BASIS
This is what relational expert refers to making EMOTIONAL DEPOSIT.
Words have the power to give life and death; to heal or to cut; to encourage or discourage.
Believe me husbands, this costs us nothing but works wonder.
These are some of the things I normally say to my wife:
“I’m so blessed to have you.”
“I don’t know what my life would be without you.”
“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”
Another simple idea is to never forget to say, “I love you three times a day.”
I got this one from my showbiz friend Jimmy Santos.
You may say it’s corny but this will be highly appreciated by your wife.
Say it the way you want to; the feeling and the assurance of being in love with each other.
Make emotional deposit, so you have something to withdraw.
No deposit, no withdrawal!
GIVE YOUR WIFE A MONTHLY SPENDING ALLOWANCE
Whether you like it or not, if you treat your wife as a queen she will treat you like a king.
Some say, the current physical, mental or emotional condition of a woman is only a reflection on how the man of the house treats her.
Women want to look good and feel good.
They want to feel important and be pampered.
This is the reason why I set a special budget, again may I repeat special.
This budget is given to my wife at the beginning of each month which she can have anything she likes as long as it fits the budget without any question asks.
This also makes her feel secure that she need not squeeze the budget of the house expense to buy things that she wants in life.
Think. Reflect. Apply.
When was the last time you have dated your wife? A week ago? A month ago? Hopefully, not a year ago?
How often do you speak words of appreciation and encouragement to your wife in a day?
Have you set aside a monthly budget for your wife to enjoy and feel good about herself?
There are many other things I want to share but my time for now is up…
Time to make some emotional deposit to the love of my life and that is my ‘wifey’.