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HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE 12

MY UNFAITHFUL HUSBAND

Unfaithful ba ang asawa mo?
Pagod kaba sa paulit-ulit nyang panloloko?
Anung gagawin mo sa ganitong klase ng sitwasyon?

Being in this type of situation is one of the most painful things that any married couple can experience. Mabilis magpatawad kung tunay itong pinagsisihan at hindi na muling uulitin. Pero ang mas masaklap dito ay ang paulit-ulit niya itong ginagawa habang paulit-ulit mo siyang pinapatawad.

Ano nga ba ang dapat mong gawin sa ganitong uri ng sitwasyon?

Patatawarin mo nalang ba siya ng paulit-ulit alang-alang sa mga anak ninyo? Papabayaan mo nalang ba na lokohin ka niya kahit ang sakit sakit na nito? O makikipaghiwalay ka at maghahanap nalang ng iba?
Ito ang ilan sa mga hakbang na maaaring makatulong sayo kung sakaling dumaan ka sa sitwasyong ganito:

EVALUATE YOURSELF

Bago mo pa man din sisihin at paratangan ang asawa mong ‘unfaithful’, sandali mong silipin ang sarili mo. Isipin mong mabuti kung saan ka nagkulang. Itanong mo sa sarili mo ang mga katanungang ito:

  1. What are my lapses in our relationship? Ano ang naging pagkukulang ko?
  2. How did your husband get a chance to flirt with another woman? Paano nagkaroon ng pagkakataon ang asawa kong tumingin o mahumaling sa iba?
  3. Na-protektahan ko ba ang asawa ko? Have I protected my husband against temptations?
  4. Did I treat and serve my husband well? Naalagaan at napaglingkuran ko ba ang asawa ko?
  5. Have I faithfully done my role/part as a wife? Nagagampanan ko ba ang role ko bilang kanyang asawa?
  6. Am I faithful to my husband in all circumstances and occasion? Faithful ba ko sa asawa ko sa lahat ng pagkakataon at sa lahat ng bagay?
  7. Do I make time for my spouse? May panahon ba ko sa asawa ko?
  8. Am I too possessive? Seloso ba ako?
  9. Did I allow myself to be the submit to our relationship or am I dominant? Nag-papasakop ba ako sa asawa ko o masyado akong dominante?
  10. Am I a constant nagger? Nagiging nagger naba ako at hindi na ako nakikinig sa kanya?
  11. Do I support him in all his undertakings and decisions? Sinusuportahan ko ba ang asawa ko sa lahat ng bagay especially sa mga decisions niya?
  12. Did my husband feel that I love him and care for him? Nararamdaman na ng asawa ko na mahal ko siya at mahalaga siya sa akin?
  13. Do I pray for my husband’s well-being? Naipapanalangin ko ba ang asawa ko?

Yan at marami pang ibang katanungan. Alam kong kahit ‘hindi’ ang sagot mo sa karamihan ng mga tanong na ito, at narealize mo na may pagkukulang karin, hindi parin ito licence para mangaliwa si mister.

Pero magandang maitanong mo rin ito sa sarili mo, para malaman mo kung ano ang mga improvement na kailangan mong gawin para manumbalik ang iyong pagmamahalan. Parang lang siyang bahay, in time you have to renovate your house.

Maganda ring ma-evaluate mo ang sarili mo upang sayo magsimula ang pagbabago. Mahirap kasing magbago ang ibang tao kung hindi magsisimula mismo sa iyo ang pagbabago. Sigurado akong aabutan ka na ng end of the world, pero hindi mo parin nababago ang asawa mo. Ngunit kung sisimulan mo ang pagbabago sa sarili mo, it will have a domino effect sa partner mo.

I will continue this blog tomorrow. For now, I want you to find time to answer the questions and reflect on your answers. From these answers you can create a new approach and strategy, kung paano ka makikitungo sa husband mo.

Do not allow pessimism get along the way while you are doing this exercise.

I know this is frustrating and there is a sense of hopelessness.
Prayerfully consider all your answers.

If you feel that your family and love is worth fighting for, you have to do whatever it takes to fight for it. You got to set aside your personal feelings. Do what you think is right for your marriage to work.

Uulitin ko, change must start from you!

Never expect others to change, if you are not willing to take the first step.

Remember, ALWAYS CHINK POSITIVE!

Chink-Quote-Change

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