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Bakit May Mga Taong Mahilig Maglihim?

ANG TAONG NAGSASABI NG TOTOO AY WALANG DAPAT IKATAKOT

Ikaw ba yung taong mahilig maglihim? Minsan gumawa ng ibang istorya para may mai-sagot sa iyong kausap o makalusot sa isang sitwasyon? O kung hindi man, may kilala ka bang ganito na akala mo totoo ang sinasabi pero may pinagtatakpan pala?

???Ma, may group study kami, late ako makakauwi???
(Pero gigimik lang pala)

???Hindi bayaan mo na, okay lang ako???
(Kahit na lumalaki na ang issue ninyong magasawa)

???Everything???s going well Sir???
(Pero nag back out na pala yung kliyente)

???Oo, nasa akin pa yung ipinatago mo, wag ka mag-alala???
(Pero matagal mo na itong nawala)

There are two kinds of secrets in this world.

Una, yung ipinagkatiwala sa???yo na hindi mo dapat sabihin, at pangalawa, ay yung mga bagay na kailangan mo na ipagbigay alam o kailangan na malaman ng taong concerned para hindi na lumaki ang problema o para makaiwas sa kung ano mang kapahamakan.

Ang nangyayari lang minsan, kahit alam naman natin na malalagay sa alanganin ang ating sitwasyon o sitwasyon ng iba, may taong masasaktan, o magbubunga lang ng iba pang problema, eh pilit pa rin natin itong tinatago sa ating mga sarili.

Bakit nga ba may mga taong mahilig maglihim?

AYAW MAKASAKIT NG DAMDAMIN

Feeling natin pinoprotektahan natin ang damdamin ng iba kapag hindi natin sinabi ang totoo o ang nararapat niyang malaman.

Narinig niyo na ba yung kasabihang ???What you don???t know won???t hurt you????

Mali ito mga kapatid because it would hurt more kapag naglihim ka dahil maaring malaman niya ito sa iba o kaya???y sumingaw sa ibang paraan.

Keeping something from them will just delay the problem pero hindi nito masosolusyunan ang issue mo. In fact baka lumala pa ito. Kahit pa sa tingin mong baka hindi niya kayanin, may karapatan siyang malaman ito.

HINDI BINIBIGYAN NG HALAGA

???Maliit na bagay lang yun, di niya na mahahalata yun???
???Sa dami ng iniisip nya, malabong malaman niya pa yun???
???Di naman importante yun???

Matanong kita, paanong hindi naging importante ang isang bagay na alam mong makakaapekto sa relasyon niyong mag asawa, magkaibgan, pamilya, o ka-opisina?

Tandaan mo na kahit pa maliit na bagay yan, kapag nasanay ka sa ganyang paguugali, para yang basura na naiipon hanggang sa gumuho na. Kaya huwag mong hintayin na umabot sa ganyan at baka ikaw din ang maiipit sa huli.

If you want to establish or maintain a good relationship, TRUST must be present. If there is an ABSENCE of TRUST, the relationship will not be complete.

DELAYING TACTICS

???Baka may problema siya, di ko muna sasabihin???
???May kausap siya eh, bukas na lang???
???Di siya nakatingin, hintayin ko munang lumapit sakin???
???Iniisip ko pa kung paano ko sasabihin???

Ito yung tinatawag nating delaying tactics na kung saan gumagawa tayo ng excuse para hindi matuloy yung dapat mangyari.

Ito din yung pinapalabas mong sila ang busy at walang oras para makinig sa dapat mong sabihin, pero ang totoo, gusto mo lang ito patagalin.

???AKO NA BAHALA???

May mga pagkakataong akala natin na tayo si superman o si superwoman na tipong feeling natin eh kaya natin manipulahin o kontrolin ang lahat ng hindi sila nai-involve.

Halimbawa:
May problema na sa opisina pero hindi mo sinasabi sa boss mo
May dapat kang aminin sa ka-relasyon mo pero hindi ka nagsasalita
Naipit ka sa isang atraso, pero nilihim mo sa magulang mo

Kapag may mga ganitong pagkakataon, isipin mo na hindi lahat kaya mong solusyunan. Keep in mind na in order to solve a certain problem, admitting that there???s something wrong is the key before you can get out of it.

REVENGE

???Eh bakit siya din naman naglilihim sa akin???
???Dati nga hindi niya sinabi sakin yun, sa iba ko pa nalaman???

Wala kayong magandang patutunguhan o mareresolba kung ang relationship niyo ay puno ng lihim. Baka sa kakalihim niyo, masanay na kayo at hindi na muli magsabi pa ng totoo???in the end, pareho lang kayong naglolokohan which can really ruin what you have right now.

THINK. REFLECT. REPLY.

Sino yung taong pinag-lilihiman o napaglihiman mo na?
Bakit hindi mo ito sinabi kaagad?
Kailan mo ito balak sabihin para hindi na lumaki pa?

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