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Bakit ang Bilis Mamuna ng Iba kaysa punahin ang sarili?

“Tignan mo SIYA , ‘kala mo kung sinong magaling”
“Grabe SILA, sama ng ugali. Naku, kakarmahin yan”
“Hahaha. Nakakatawa naman suot NIYA. Pati make-up oh, ano ba yan!”

??? ???SIYA
??? ???SILA
??? ???NIYA

Anong kapansin-pansin sa mga ito? Pagtuturo sa kapwa hindi ba?

Siguro para sa iba, paraan lamang ito ng pagsasabi ng totoo pero kung titignan natin mabuti, ito’y isang paraan ng pananakit sa kapwa by criticizing their actions, behaviors, or attitude behind their backs. Yung bang pinupuna mo ang tingin mong mali sa kanila base sa iyong opinion, pero hindi ang sarili mong kamalian.

Giving criticisms are okay only if it is constructive or helpful to make someone stronger and better, pero kung ang objective lang is to gossip, embarrass the other person, or make him/her feel less good about himself then may mali sa scenario.

Sabi nga:
“Bago tayo magtanggal ng dumi ng iba, pansinin muna natin ang ating sarili”
Bakit nga ba may mga taong mabilis pumuna ng ibang tao?

1. INSECURITY
All of us have our own insecurities. Ito yung mga bagay na wala tayo na nakikita natin sa iba. Pwedeng ugali, achievements, gamit, o maging sa sarili nating itsura.

Pero imbis na maging masaya tayo para sa kanila at sa kung anong meron tayo, pinupuna natin just to feel “even”.

Halimbawa, nagbukas ng bagong business ang dati mong ka-opisina —yung dapat “congratulations” o “ang galing mo” na comment, sinasabi natin sa iba na: “sus, pera naman ng magulang niya yan eh”

2. MAY TINATAGO
Minsan, may mga taong nakakagagawa ng mga maling bagay na ayaw na nilang malaman ng iba para mapanatili ang image na meron sila.

Kaya pag nakita nilang may gumagawa din nito, pinangungunahan na nila ito by criticizing the other person para mabaon ng tuluyan yung same mistakes nila.

“Ayoko na tumabi diyan, balita ko nangopya daw yun nung finals eh“— pero last semester, ginawa mo din pala.

3. GUSTO MAKALAMANG o MAGYABANG
This is when the person agrees that you are indeed great at something pero feeling niya mas magaling pa din siya kaya hinahanapan ka niya ng butas.

This is often obvious to comments like: “Magaling pala siya magsalita sa harapan, pero kung ako yan, nilagyan ko pa yan ng PowerPoint presentation. Ganun dapat!”

4. THE NEED TO BE ACCEPTED
We all want to belong and be accepted by people around us, with tulad ng school or office barkada.

Pero kung ang gusto mo makasama ay mahilig pumuna at ikaw ay hindi ganoon, pipilitin mong aralin ang ugaling iyon just to be accepted kahit na alam mong masama at nakakasakit ng damdamin.

Sooner or later, you???ll notice that you???re already “one of them” dahil sa maling paraan.

THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.

Matanong kita, mahilig ka rin ba mamuna ng ibang tao?
Ano ang pwede nating gawin para maiwasan natin ito?
Ano kaya ang pwede nating gawin imbis na mamuna ay tumulong sa ibang tao?

Check Ourselves Before We Even Criticize Others

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