Chinkee Tan

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ANO BA TALAGA?

September 6, 2019 By Chinkee Tan

Naku malamang marami ang makare-relate dito sa
topic na ito. I think, in every relationship, there is n
immunity to fight pero ang tanong, normal ba ito?

Bakit nga ba nagtatalo ang mag-asawa o magbf/gf?
Kailangan nga ba ito o may paraan ba para maiwasan
ang mga ito? Well, siguro isa-isahin na lang natin.

In this blog, let us discuss the deeper reasons why
couples fight. Sa kahit na anong relationship,
mahalaga kung paano natin aayusin ang problema.

First in list would be the

Table of Contents

Toggle
  • POWER
  • CLOSENESS
  • RESPECT
    • “Hinda naman talaga yung phone o tuwalya ang pinagtatalunan n’yo kundi yung mas malalim na bagay na dapat pinag-uusapan ninyo.” –  Chinkee Tan, Filipino Motivational Speaker
  • THINK. REFLECT. APPLY. 

POWER

“Bakit hindi ka na naman tumawag at nagsabi na nakauwi ka na?”
“Di ba dapat ikaw ang susundo sa mga bata ngayon?”
“Bakit ito lang ang binigay mo na sweldo?”

Sounds familiar ba? Minsan ba pinagtalunan n’yo na rin kung
sino ang gagawa nito, kung ano ang dapat gawin dito, kung
ano ang dapat na suotin sa ganito… these are all about control.

May bahagi sa buhay natin na alam natin or maybe naniniwala
tayo na mas alam natin ang isang bagay kaya dapat tayo ang
masunod at kailangan sumunod ang ating partner sa gusto natin.

Both persons are different human beings.
Magkaiba kayo ng kinalakihan, magkaiba kayo ng nakasanayan
at marami pang iba. With this, kailangan mapag-usapan ito.

Yung ginagawa ng ibang couple ay maaring effective sa kanila,
pero hindi effective sa inyo. And that’s normal. Stop comparing.
You have to learn what you can and cannot control in your relationship.

Kailangan magkasundo at mag-give way kung kinakailangan.

Next would be

CLOSENESS

“Buong maghapon naglalaro ka na lang dyan.”
“Di mo man lang ako hinintay? Umalis ka na agad?”
“Bakit ayaw mong sumama sa family/barkada gathering?”

Madalas hindi tayo aware sa mga bagay na kinaiinisan talaga
natin. Minsan nga kinalilimutan na lang natin tapos kapag
may nangyari, maaalala natin yung nakaraan at away na naman!

You see, parang mga dishes lang ‘yan eh. Hindi naman
pwede na lahat ng mga plato na nasa sink ay sabay na lilinisin.
Kailangan, isa-isahin talaga ang pagsabon at pagbanlaw.

It simply means, kung gusto natin ng “us time” with our
spouse or partner, we have to tell them at the same time,
kailangan din na nakikinig din ang asawa natin.

So the next time na maglalaro s’ya ng games, may limit na
para maging meaningful ang time n’yo together. Hindi yung
magagalit tayo sa game, without acknowledging kung ano
talaga ang problema.

The last one is 

RESPECT

“Bakit nagdadabog ka na naman? ”
“Bakit ba hindi mo malagay sa labahan yung medyas mo?”
“Bakit ba ayaw mo? Mag-asawa naman tayo!”

Ang daming bakit. Lol!

Simplehan lang natin. Tingnan natin sa ganito:
Kapag ikaw ang na-late, kasi traffic.
Pero kapag partner mo ang na-late, iisipin mo na hindi
s’ya responsible at hindi na naman s’ya nag-organize ng oras n’ya.

You see?
Minsan may mga perspective tayo na pabor lang sa atin.
Hindi natin pinapakinggan ang totoong saloobin ng asawa
natin or hinayaan na lang natin na ganun kaya paulit-ulit
na lang na pinagtatalunan.

Lagi kang nagtataka kung bakit nagdadabog ang asawa
mo, yun pala bigat na bigat na s’ya sa dala n’ya at hindi mo
man lang pala tinulungan.

So we have to learn how to respect our spouse as well. Tao
rin s’ya. Hindi lang ikaw ang tao sa inyo na may pangangailangan
at may pakiramdam. Both of you has to speak up.

So start expressing your true feelings with one another. Talk and listen.
Communicate and understand. Mahalaga ang mga ‘yan dahil

“Hinda naman talaga yung phone o tuwalya ang pinagtatalunan n’yo
kundi yung mas malalim na bagay na dapat pinag-uusapan ninyo.”
–  Chinkee Tan, Filipino Motivational Speaker

THINK. REFLECT. APPLY. 

  • Anu-ano ang mga dapat kontrolado ninyong mag-asawa?
  • Paano ninyo ini-spend ang quality time ninyo?
  • Gaano kalaki ang respeto mo sa asawa mo at paano mo ito pinapakita?—————————————————————————————————————————————-

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Chinkee Tan

Chinkee Tan is a Wealth Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Best-selling Author on personal finance and wealth management. He has written 16 best-selling books and counting. His mission is to equip millions of Filipinos to be free from financial stress & experience financial freedom.



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Chinkee Tan

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Hi my name is Chinkee Tan, and my goal is to help you become financially wealthy and debt-free!

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