An open letter to my dear wife Nove Ann.
Today marks our 18th year anniversary with the Lord.
I can still remember the day I made my vows on October 23, 1999 at one of the hotels at Ortigas.
“To love you, to honor you, to protect you and to serve you.”
This is what I’ve discovered about my vows after 18 years:
To LOVE is a CHOICE, a DECISION and a COMMITMENT.
I can’t trust my feelings and emotions.
If I do, I think we will not be in good terms.
There are days that you will feel bad about me and vise versa.
But praise be to God, that He showed me the real meaning of love.
That God chose to love us in spite of our shortcomings.
That’s the reason why…
I choose to look at your good side, not the bad.
I choose to forgive and not nurture the bitterness in my heart.
I choose to pray for you, not resent you.
To HONOR must be DELIBERATE and INTENTIONAL.
There are times that I feel it is hard to give honor when you are emotionally upset and hurt. Nevertheless, I need to be mindful on how I treat you, speak to you and look at you.
One thing that really helped me a lot is the quote that I placed in my heart, “It doesn’t really matter how right I am, if I hurt my wife’s feeling, I’m already wrong.”
I need to protect you from my selfish me.
I need to protect you from people who want to take advantage of you.
I need to protect you from people who want to hurt you.
I need to protect you sometimes from yourself and remind you that you should not eat too much sweet and only eat one cup of brown rice. LOL!
To SERVE means, I must DIE to my own SELFISH NATURE and put your interest first before mine
There is a tendency for me to think more about myself than others.
Especially when I will come home tired from my professional commitments. I want to watch my favorite series, answer my emails and write more blogs.
But whenever you ask me to make you a glass of hot tea,
I will gladly make one for you, regardless of how I feel.
Overall, the underlying verse that guides me in our marriage is this.
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me.
I pray and hope that God will give me the grace to continue to fulfill what I promised.
Gusto ko makasama kita hanggang langit, kasi naniniwala ako sa #forever. Halma na halma kita! (mahal na mahal kita, feeling millennial)
NAGMAMAHAL. Ang iyong cute na asawa, Chinkee Tan
“It doesn’t really matter how right I am, if I hurt my wife’s feeling, I’m already wrong.”